Asexuality explained by people who identify as "ace"
by Elisabeth Slay
Being asexual doesn’t mean or make someone “broken” or a “plant.”
“Asexuality in simple terms is a lack of sexual attraction,” said Sahara Haubert. “Asexual can be used as an orientation or as an umbrella term for the asexual spectrum or gray spectrum.”
Haubert is a member of the Oklahoma Asexual Alliance (OAA).
Asexual Awareness Week, also referred to as “Ace” Week, is October 21-27, and its purpose is to educate those who don’t understand.
According to Haubert, people often assume those who identify as asexual or ace can’t have sex or be in a relationship.
“This is false, some aces do not enjoy sex, or do not engage in sexual relations. However, there are aces that do have and enjoy sexual relations,” she explained.
Ace Week is a time to celebrate one’s identity, explain the spectrum of asexuality and address misconceptions.
“It is important to have visibility because without having something to look at and say, ‘This explains what I feel,’ it makes it seem that we are just broken because we do not experience things the way that society seems to imply that we are ‘supposed to,’” ace and member of OAA, Carin Brooks said.
In the past the OAA hosted a table at the University of Central Oklahoma and talked with students who may struggle with figuring out their identity. This year, OAA member Joshua Stone said he wants to use Ace Week as an opportunity to help those who may be having a hard to time.
“Seriously, I think that asexuals in today's more open environment may be construed as prudish, scared, celibate, unlucky or sexually immature,” Stone said. “I really would like to talk about it with people and make potentially unaware or closeted aces aware that not being overly sexual is okay too.”
For Haubert, Ace Week has helped her discover where she belongs and form bonds with people.
“It really has just been able to strengthen my connection with the ace community, as well as the LGBT+ community as a whole,” she said.
All hope to put an end to stereotypes, help others feel comfortable and encourage people to educate themselves.
“I hope that we can get to a point where asexual isn’t seen as a false orientation. I would love to be able to say I’m asexual and not have to defend myself,” Haubert said.
“I hope that in the future, asexual kids will be able to understand that they are asexual without having to awkwardly try to force themselves to act as if they were allosexual,” Brooks said.
“I would like to see more awareness about the issue so people who identify as an ace don't feel pressured to do something they don't want to do,” Stone said.
Copyright The Gayly – October 21, 2018 @ 7:40 a.m. CDT.