~ Pictured above, – (left) Lance with Chris Kattan on the set of “Just Crazy Enough.” Kattan played both twins in the movie.
Lance with the rest of the, “Just Crazy Enough” cast, (l-r) Eleanor Threatt, Jonathan Beck Reed, Desmond Mason, Judith Midyett, Josh Norman, Nikhil Bhoplay and Don Taylor. ~

Lance McDaniel is the Executive Director of the deadCENTER Film Festival, Oklahoma’s largest film festival, and an independent filmmaker who has worked on 13 feature films. This past summer, Lance co-wrote and directed the family comedy, Just Crazy Enough, starring Chris Kattan, and produced a documentary about the first female Governor of Oklahoma, First & Female. Lance’s feature length documentary, Widowbago, won Best Oklahoma film in 2007. And, his short, The Gymnast, won a Best Actress award at the Los Angeles International Film Festival. Lance is also a DGA 1st AD, working on four features for Oscar winning producer Gray Frederickson, the Chickasaw Nation’s first feature film, Pearl, and the Brooks Douglass story Heaven’s Rain. Lance served as on-set dresser and props for Michael Winterbottom’s The Killer Inside Me. In Los Angeles, Lance worked as Producers Assistant for Oscar winner Al Ruddy on Million Dollar Baby and Cloud 9.
Lance has a Masters in Film from Oklahoma City University and an undergraduate degree from Stanford University, where he currently serves as Event Chair for his 20 year reunion.

1. Tell us a bit about yourself.

I grew up in Alva, went to college at Stanford University and worked as an internet consultant in San Francisco, London, & New York before quitting my job and moving to Los Angeles to make movies. I retuned back home to Oklahoma 7 years ago to make independent films and be closer to my family.

2. How did your career in film begin?

After completing a film program at NYU, OCU’s Fritz Keirsch got me an interview with Gray Frederickson, who hired me to be his assistant on Cloud 9, a beach volleyball comedy filming in Malibu. The other producer on the film, Al Ruddy, then hired me to be his assistant on Million Dollar Baby, and both he and the film won the Oscar. After that, Gray asked me to move back to Oklahoma and help produce a series of low budget horror films. I’ve been here ever since.

3. How would you best describe your style?

I typically dress in suit and tie if I am speaking for work or fundraising. Otherwise, I am very casual and tend to dress to amuse myself.

4. What prompted you to begin writing?

I knew I wanted to write my own film scripts from the beginning. Both feature films I have directed were based on scripts I co-wrote with my producing partner, Sean Lynch. I have also been writing a weekly column on independent film for the Friday Paper for the past two years.

5. What is the most embarrassing thing in your career?

I do not embarrass very easily. But, I have certainly worked on some films that were embarrassing.

6. If you could work with one other writer or director, who would it be?

Gus Van Sant’s “My Own Private Idaho” is the film that made me want to make my own films. His career is filled with huge risks like “Elephant” and wild successes like “Good Will Hunting” and “Milk.” I would love to work with him at some point.

7. Any hobbies?

I go to church at St. Luke’s United Methodist, read a lot of fiction, watch a lot of movies, go to live concerts and see as many OKC Thunder games as possible.

8. Goals for the future both personally and professionally.

My goal is to grow deadCENTER into a huge local event that draws national attention to Oklahoma City as a creative destination. And, I’d like to continue writing and directing really fun feature films.

9. How has being the Executive Director of the deadCenter Film Festival added your already fabulous career?

Working at deadCENTER has been awesome. I volunteered for 5 years before being hired. So, I knew it would allow me to meet great filmmakers and watch lots of movies. But, the best part about being Executive Director is that I get to go around the state teaching high school kids about the different film opportunities for them here in Oklahoma. And, I now sit on the board for several creative organizations.

10. What is the most exciting part of your career?

The most exciting part of my career is getting to create something from nothing. I just finished a feature film, Just Crazy Enough, which took me two months to write, three years to raise money, one month to film and a year to finish editing and adding music. And, now that it is done, I get to start the whole process over again.

11. What keeps you motivated and passionate about what you do?

I am motivated by being around other people that are constantly working to improve their own life and the lives of those around them. Oklahoma City is filled with great artists, musicians, athletes and business people that leverage their success to improve the city and help those that need it most.

12. Tell us about where you grew up and about your parents.

I grew up in Alva, Oklahoma. My parents met working in the local Methodist Church and then had three boys, of which I am the youngest.

13. Final thoughts.

I am excited that the Gayly is back in action. And, I am really looking forward to Pride this year.

If we’re making changes in life, we experience stress. That’s part of the process. In fact it’s a turning point. Once we meet stress, we charge ahead or retreat. We pass through the “danger zone” as the champion or we fall back.

The beauty of stress is that it signals that change is at hand. The poison of stress is that it signals that change is at hand. So often we take a stress signal as a red alert and run. But that’s because we don’t know the process. We also mistake the stress and pain of change as dangers.

One would think that as much as we live in stress, we would know stress. We should recognize its smell from 100 paces; know its favorite carrion, whine and swan song. But alas that’s not so.

It’s like we met at the Halloween Ball, and we didn’t want to remove the mask for fear of what’s underneath. While truth or facts are still hidden, we can pretend the status quo is pretty, even when it’s killing us.

We’ve all met a dream date whose appeal was gone with the wind at the moment he or she opened their mouth. Maybe the same fear of what might come next keeps us from knowing enough about stress to sink its battleship. But a little insight is the key to winning the upper hand.

If you dare to look, here’s a peek at stress: When stress is not describing a state of mind or emotions, it describes tension, pressure, force or emphasis on materials as metals, plastics, geological formations, music and speech. It measures how much push or pull can be placed on an object. It’s commonly used in dialogue about the elastic nature of this or that. And stress can relate to durability, impact, and sustainability –breaking, shattering and exploding. That’s beginning to sound like some friends’ behavior. That’s my point.

The mind and emotions have both fixed or hardwired parts and an ability to be flexible or reinventing.

The drama of stress is the play between what we expect or desire and reality as we see it. It’s the struggle of personal habits and new choices. It can be the war between our patience and the time it takes to grow a new habit while old habits fall away. And it can be others’ actions or beliefs coming to battle our willingness to understand. These are growth processes that take time as they redevelop a brain cell (habit/new way of meeting).

Of course there’s more. But you know that.

So making choices about ‘Coming Out’ and processing through stress is largely weathering the zone between old reality and new reality. Coming Out can be stressful, but that will pass.

I consider a temporary condition a better option compared to a chronic malaise.

Remember, there are supports, education and planning that soften or eliminate stress. So I suggest, push ahead, wisely and in the right time and manner. Even if the danger zone is not a mirage, it’s only temporary.

Editor’s Note: Steven Michael Hall facilitates the Coming Out Workshop with Shelley McGoffin each Tuesday at the Dennis R. Neill Equality Center in Tulsa. Contact Oklahomans for Equality at 918 743 4297 for details about the program or visit www.okeq.org.

“A Friend For A Friend” was created in 1991 by Alice Wilder-Bates. Beginning with dog walking, litter changing and providing pet food for people who were living with HIV/AIDS, the organization was inspired by the loss of David Wilder to AIDS. Alice Wilder-Bates is the mother of David, and decided to turn her son’s death into something meaningful. Today the program has grown to close to 100 clients, and helps with everything from picking up the tab on necessary vet bills and dog grooming to whatever may be needed to help someone in need.

“This is her tribute to her son,” said Toby Jenkins of Tulsa’s OkEq. “She has run this organization for years now, even long after his death.”
The mission of “A Friend for a Friend” is to help provide services such as vet care, grooming and food to those that are living with HIV/AIDS who otherwise couldn’t afford to maintain reasonable care of their four legged friends who bring so much comfort in such a time of need.

For information or to contact them for help, call (918) 747-6827 or visit their Facebook page at www.facebook.com/AF4AF.

Pictured above is Dorsey Glazener who says personal service and a quality repair is their main goal at Dorsey’s Auto Body Shop. The repair shop has been located on or near 39th & Youngs for over 60 years. Photo by Robin Dorner.

Located on or near the 39th street strip since 1948, Dorsey’s Auto Collision is a full service auto body repair shop with a staff well trained in appraising damages including all repairing and painting.  Over the years, body shop owner Dorsey Glazener has seen many changes in this neighborhood.

“My father opened a shop at 2205 NW 39th in 1948,” said Glazener.  “We have been in this neighborhood helping our friends and neighbors ever since.  This is such a wonderful and diverse neighborhood.”

Dorsey’s moved to 3933 N Youngs Blvd. in 1981 (just south of 39th, before you get to Ingrids!). Glazener said the wonderful families they have served for generations have also become friends. “They are a big part of our service and success.”

At times, these long-time customers of Dorsey’s have been concerned that they may not be able to have their vehicle repaired at Dorsey’s and have it paid for by the insurance company.

“Insurance companies will tell you to go to their repair shop for many reasons. You don’t have to go where they want you to go; you have the right to have your vehicle repaired at the shop of your choice,” said Glazener. “Directing repairs is not right and it disrupts relationships that we have worked at developing for years.”

Brant T. Cale, Communications Officer Oklahoma Insurance Department told the Gayly that Title 36 §1250.8 Section D prohibits insurance companies from making a consumer have their vehicle repaired at a specific repair shop.

“Insured’s or 3rd party claimants are free to have their vehicle repaired at any facility they choose, because the contract for repairs is between the body shop and the vehicle owner,” said Cale.  “Insurance companies can, however, ask an insured or claimant to take the vehicle to a specific body shop or repair facility to have the initial estimate written.”  Here is the link to the exact language: http://www.oscn.net/applications/oscn/DeliverDocument.asp?CiteID=437234.

“While it is typical for insurance companies to have contracts or agreements with repair facilities, these are usually based on setting standard repair prices and using the personnel to write the estimates,” adds Cale. “The company will usually guarantee the work of that particular facility as well.”

Always remember, the company (or adjuster) can make a suggestion that a vehicle owner use one of their preferred facilities, but they cannot force you to.
Glazener concluded by saying, “Personal service and a quality repair is our main goal. We work for you not the insurance companies.”

Dorsey also has an experienced mechanic and will help facilitate customers with renting a car if needed. Call (405) 521-1286 to make an appointment.

Vendetti (c) with Mary Scribner (l) and Charlotte Stith (r) at Club 209 in Tulsa. Vendetti performed at the Arts Bar in the Brady District last month.) Photo by Robin Dorner.

By Robin Dorner
Editor in Chief

Last month, Tulsa’s “Arts Bar,” Club 209 hosted the outrageous, brassy comedienne Cheril Vendetti for a special one-night show. Recently having moved to the Tulsa area, Vendetti is a seasoned comedienne who has appeared in comedy clubs from LA to New York.

“I love Tulsa! You gotta go to Quick Trip at least ten times a day, right? Then ya’ gotta go over to Wal Mart on Admiral, right? To get your meds.”
The crowd roared with laughter, because we’ve all been there, right?

Vendetti’s brassy voice, big hair and classic Italian look (she has olive skin – I did not say she had a big nose!) will bring Oklahomans in at least for a look-see. One inside, the quick-witted songstress/comedienne will win you over with jokes and uproarious comedy.

This state is lucky to have this quick-witted, hysterical, progressive entertainer move in – let’s not let the likes of Sally Kern run her off!

Club 209 is a martini and coffee lounge located within the Brady Arts District in Tulsa. This arts bar strives to provide a venue for promoting local artists in a relaxed, non-smoking, diverse atmosphere. Hours are 7pm till 2am, Thu – Sun. Call (918) 584-9944 for info.

Deb & her wife Lynn have a consulting business for ecommerce websites, as well as some graphic design and various assorted things.

1. Tell us a bit about yourself.

I’m a driven Aries. I love to learn and I am my biggest critic. I love to laugh, dance, and live. I work hard and play harder. I am married to the greatest woman who puts up with me and loves me unconditionally. We have three awesome little dogs that bring much joy to life.

2. How did your work in the LGBT community begin?

My work in the LGBT community began when a friend of a friend ask me to run for a board position with TOHR. He knew I had nonprofit experience and I was active in TOHR, so it seemed a perfect fit. The rest is history. I served on the Board two different times, including being on the Board that completed the opening of the community center.

3. What prompted you to begin doing this work?

I’ve been involved in the nonprofit community for more than 35 years, mostly in the fields of health, mental health, and disability. Additionally, I am a firm believer in equal rights for everyone. I truly believe what matters is heart and soul, not ethnicity, age, ability, gender, or who you love. It seemed a perfect progression to utilize my experience and skills to do what I could to make even a small change in the world. My work in HIV began like many people; I lost too many wonderful friends too early in life. I was lucky to be surrounded by and working with like-minded people. The accomplishments are shared by many- those came before, those who worked beside me, those who lead me, and those who continue the work now.

4. How would you best describe your connection with people?

My connection with people is upfront and honest. I am who I am and I love people for who they are. Thanks to my life experiences, I am blessed with the ability to relate to many different types of people. My Mom always said to put myself in another’s shoes before making any judgments. I try in all my humanity to that every day and in every interaction. We too often project our own baggage and garbage on others when in reality we’re the ones with the issue.

5. What was the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you in your work or personal life?

Oh wow, there have been so many! But the one that sticks out happened when I was the Deacon at the Parish Church of St. Jerome. It was a wedding and I was setting the altar for communion. As I went to pour the wine into the chalice, a huge spider (at least in my fear I thought it was huge) dropped into the altar. Now I’m deathly afraid of spiders, so naturally I jumped. Red wine went everywhere. I then proceeded to spend what seemed a lifetime trying to kill the spider with the patten (the little plate for the priest’s host). Suddenly I realized everyone was staring and the altar looked like I had sacrificed something on it. The whole ordeal is on tape!

6. If you could bring one person back into your life, who would it be?

I would like to bring my mother back into my life. She died when I was 36. Rarely a day goes by that I don’t want to tell her something, thank her, or ask her advice.

7. Any hobbies?

Life…really I love experiencing life and new things. I also play guitar and drums, hang with friends, love outdoor activities, and dabble from time to time in photography.

8. Goals for the future both personally and professionally.

I have four chapters of a book written. My goal is to finish it and have it published. It will be controversial as it combines two of my favorite things – religion and vampires. Other than that I’d really like to learn not to be so goal oriented and driven. LOL

9. How has living and working in Oklahoma and now in Arkansas added to your life both personally and professionally?

Tulsa was a great place to grow up. It’s a very artistic town with an amazing community spirit. I learned so much from community volunteers in so many areas. Their dedication and drive continues to inspire me daily. Living in Arkansas has been amazing but only because I live in Eureka Springs. This little haven is truly an amazing place. Sure it has its small town issues, but it really is a community where people have truly learned to live and work and play together. It’s the way the world should be. Who you are is much more important than who you love, or where you work, or the color of your skin. I invite everyone to visit this place.

10. What is the most exciting part of your life (or career)?

The people I meet and have met during my career. This is even true today as I bartend in this little tourist town. People often ask me how being a priest translates to being a bartender. I laugh and say not much different really. I still listen to people’s life issues and spiritual concerns (more often than you can know). I still make certain people get to enjoy life and remain safe. And let’s not forget the bartender’s code of ethics: what you say to your bartender when drinking remains with your bartender! LOL

11. What keeps you motivated and passionate about what you do (in any part of your life)?

I’m just a really passionate person. Lynn (my wife) and my friends tell me I’m just a dog with a bone! And I am. I will chew on something and battle for it until I believe my time with it is done. I appreciate all the things those who came before me did to help make life better for me. The way I give thanks is to do the same for those who will come after me. If we all tried to make a small difference just imagine what the world would be. I don’t think I’ve changed the world any but hopefully someone’s life is much better because of the things I have chosen to do in my life.

12. Tell us about where you grew up and about how your childhood influenced who you are today.

I was born in Coffeyville Kansas but moved to Tulsa when I was six or so. I am, in my mind, a Tulsa kid. My father had a great sense of humor, a big heart, and a hot temper. All things I inherited. My mother was sophisticated, smart, patient, and could handle anything with calm and grace. Unfortunately, it doesn’t appear I inherited any of those things. My parents made certain I had every opportunity from music lessons to dance lessons and from camping to traveling. They always told me I could do anything I put my mind to and could be anything I wanted to be. I thank them every day for giving me confidence and opportunity. More than anything though, they taught me to love people for who they are. I lost them both too early in life but they live on in me.

The AIDS Mastery Workshop is coming to the Dennis R Neill Equality Center in Tulsa on March 24th and 25th, 2012. This workshop is sponsored by the Northern Lights Alternatives (NLA), Oklahoma City and is funded by grants, fundraisers and individual donations. There is no cost to participants. All meals are provided for the weekend. While there is no cost to participants, donations are gladly accepted.

For those who are infected or affected by HIV/AIDS, this Workshop offers the opportunity to find ways of living well, of opening up new possibilities, or rediscovering them. By exploring experiences, hopes, and dreams, the Workshop offers a way to live differently, empowering you to make positive choices about how to live life with HIV rather than being controlled by it. The result will be the opportunity to live a more powerful life, make better choices and decisions, and become part of a support group like no other.

“Testing positive for HIV can have a devastating effect on a person’s life,” says Pat Hernandez, co-Facilitator of the upcoming Tulsa Workshop. “Even though the urgency around HIV/AIDS has changed because of medications now available, there’s definitely a need for support and compassion for people who have just learned that they or their loved ones are HIV positive.”

The Workshop offers a unique opportunity to not let circumstances dictate the quality of life you will live. Through conversation, guided meditations, education, and visualization exercises, participants will explore the impact HIV has on life and discover ways to reclaim it. This workshop has been life changing for so many people.

There will also be a special AIDS Service Organization for professionals to attend held on March 22-23rd, the Thursday and Friday, just prior to this regular AIDS Mastery Workshop. It will also be held at the Dennis R Neill Equality Center. Applications for either Workshop may be found on our website at www.AIDSMasteryOKC.org. For more information please call us toll-free at 1-866-304-1481.

The first AIDS Mastery Workshop was in January 1986, in New York, at the Actors Institute. The workshop was created by Sally Fisher in response to her friends in the creative arts being affected early on by HIV and because nothing was yet available that spoke of personal empowerment. Since this time, the Mastery has continued nationally and internationally. Since its introduction here in Oklahoma in 1988, there have been over 75 AIDS Mastery Workshops held locally, with over 1,000 graduates.

For additional information, contact Diana Blocherer, NLA President, at 405-838-0666, or Chuck Longacre, NLA Vice President, at 405-426-0000.

“You are cordially invited…” We love getting these notes! We get to go to a wedding, a graduation or just a party; big fun. There’s always plenty of food and drinks. We know that we will be accepted, since we got invited. So we go to the event and have a great time.

I’d like to invite you to something a little different. “You are cordially invited…to church.” Please join us Sundays at 6pm for worship and fellowship. Cathedral of Hope meets at Mayflower UCC, located at 3901 63rd St. NW in Oklahoma City. We are an intentionally gay-friendly congregation, gladly serving the LGBTQIA community for over 11 years.

So, come join us this Easter season. Come as you are. Come and worship. Be a part of a faith community that loves you and accepts you. You are always welcome here. I came to this church back in November and found them to be warm and loving. They continue to accommodate me and my family each week. I came from a small town in Iowa, where I served a small congregation, and have been in ministry with The United Church of Christ for over 20 years. I enjoy being in the OKC metro area, and continue to discover new things about the area.

One thing I’m finding in the last few years is how many people have just given up on church, especially among the LGBTQIA community. Don’t give up. Claim a new faith, a gay faith, and a Christian faith. Come to Cathedral of Hope OKC. You are cordially invited.

All four concerts will be performed in St. Paul’s Episcopal Cathedral, the finest acoustical facility for chamber music in Oklahoma City. The three evening concerts will be performed at 7:30 pm, and the Sunday afternoon concert will be performed at 4 pm.

Works of Bach include pieces for piano, cello, organ and a piano trio. Brahms works include a sextet, two quintets, a piano trio and two-instrument sonatas. The Festival will even feature a Brahms arrangement of a Bach composition.