My mom is the first giant whose shoulders I stood upon
Happy Mother's Day
- by Dustin Woods
Visionary Columnist
Here are three perspectives on Mother’s Day: Mine, someone who doesn’t have a great mom, and someone who is a mother.
This year, Mother’s Day is on my mind a lot, given that I’ve taken a major step to help my mom have a smoother retirement. I recently purchased a duplex in my hometown of Yukon, where my brother, sister, and aunt still live today. The plan is to move my mom into one half of the duplex and rent out the other half, keeping my mom’s housing costs stable.
Noting costs is important for someone about to be on Social Security, given that she recently received a mortgage escrow update that raised her monthly payments by about $100. I’m far better situated to absorb that sort of unplanned budget increase than she is, and I want to see her retire early enough to enjoy some time traveling abroad.
So, to ensure that she could take this step with peace of mind, I stepped outside my comfort zone and did something I hadn’t planned on: estate planning. Setting up a will, power of attorney, medical power of attorney, advance directives, and a trust were not on my to-do list. But when my mom asked, “What happens to me if I sell my house, move into this duplex and then heaven forbid that you should die?” I couldn’t answer that question confidently. As a gay man with no children, I hadn’t given much thought to what would happen after I pass. So I got legal help to ensure that not only is my mom taken care of, but my partner and my nieces and nephews are, too.
We all stand on the shoulders of giants, and my mom is the first giant whose shoulders I stood upon. She taught me so many things, but being a decent human being is one of the most valuable lessons I learned from her.
I can’t fathom what it must be like to have grown up with a mother who wasn’t the center of one’s intellectual upbringing. I especially find it difficult to consider that one’s mother wouldn’t be a positive, loving, and supportive influence in one’s life. But far too often this is the case. I know some people have terrible mothers, and they probably feel much the same way about this holiday that I feel about Father’s Day; just another day on the calendar.
We use this holiday not only to honor the past, present, and future mothers of the world, but also to inspire future mothers to see the glowing adoration that comes from the supreme sacrifice that women make to perpetuate our species. I hope some new or future mother out there reads this column and thinks what an awesome potential she cradles in her arms and nourishes with her being. The potential you hold is incredible; by remembering and sharing your renewable resource of love, you can bring forth compassionate progeny.
I know my mom would do anything for me, and in many ways, she already has, so it takes very little for me to want to do anything I can for her.
The Gayly online. 5/10/2026 @ 3:22 p.m. CST.