The best kids two moms could ask for

Read Believing in the Impossible now available on Amazon

by Robin Dorner
Editor in Chief

I sat down to read Believing in the Impossible, and thought to myself, “why am I so interested in reading this book? I have never wanted to have a child.”

But something truly compelled me to read the book. It’s a book about a lesbian couple, Casey and Meredith Marsh-Shaevitz, and the struggle to have children of their own. One of the mom’s had two children from a previous same-sex marriage, but it was important for the other mom to have children.

Maybe you’ve heard the term, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” That statement could not be truer in this case. But at a point of “sink or swim” in their relationship, they chose to swim – together.

These women share their story of trying to conceive from 2012-2016, the struggles, emotional turmoil and expense of in-vitro fertilization.

The storyteller is Casey. From the beginning of the book, I spotted how wonderfully she spoke about Meredith, always using words that built her up as a person.

The chapter titled “Growing Pains” depicted their journey from where they began and where they found themselves emotionally, and after much counseling.

Casey had two beautiful children from a previous marriage and was divorced. Meredith had never married and never had children. One was a High School dropout, the other a timid country girl. They describe their early lives as “the pits,” and now they feel they are “makin’ it.”

But it wasn’t easy. Makin’ it takes a lot of work. And growing up they both somewhat felt feeling of being unloved and different, something most of us in the LGBTQ+ community feel at some time in our lives.

And, like many of us, their pasts included sexual abuse. There was other abuse, some self-inflicted, and, like so many of us, difficulty in relationships.

But when they found each other, it was different. Better than either had ever felt in a relationship. And the counseling the two received only made it better.

It was a hell of a struggle, as described in the chapter, “Hell is a feeling.” Their goal was for Meredith to conceive. After many failed attempts, Casey tried but found she had an illness that would change everything entirely. The illness left her unable to become pregnant.  

It was truly amazing how these two faced such struggles but continued to become stronger together through it all.

I kept reading intently. I came to the chapter “Losing a part of myself,” and I cried through most of it. Keep in mind I have zero desire to have a child, and I already knew how the book ends…I’ve seen the pictures. But I read this on the edge of my seat and I was on an airplane. Not a good idea. But I was so interested in exactly what happened through the entire process of Meredith’s pregnancy and delivery.

The book is not only educational; it’s heart-breaking and enlightening, happy and sad, tragic and joyful – all of these things all at the same time and throughout the book. I truly had a hard time putting it down.

I have left out much of what is in the book, and the pictures are a bit of a “spoiler alert” as far as the outcome goes. To use one woman’s eggs in another woman’s uterus combined with their “perfect daddy” sperm is simply remarkable.

The most recent Marsh-Shaevitz family photo, the family attending OKC Pride, scenes from the gender reveal party, and spoiler alert…it’s twins! Photos provided.

Copyright The Gayly. 3/22/2019 @ 10:52 a.m. CST.