Activist mom, son offer hope and love

by Shaun Kamiko
Special to The Gayly

I consider myself an activist and an advocate regarding HIV and AIDS. I share my personal stories. I encourage and educate people. I want people to learn from my mistakes. I am doing my part to end the stigma.

That said, my mother is an activist regarding parenting gay children. She is proud to have successfully raised a gay son. She tells everyone. She counsels parents who come to her for advice. She shares her pains and her triumphs and the road to acceptance...for some parents, it isn't as easy as it was for her.

The day after I came out to her, she drove to what used to be called The Center and grabbed every pamphlet and piece of literature they offered. She checked out books from the library. She educated herself about the gay experience and HIV. She wanted to understand me and be a better parent and ally. People approach her and ask her how to deal with their 13-year-old son who just told them he's gay...or their 15-year-old daughter they suspect is a lesbian. She shares her thoughts and feelings and helps them understand what their family is going through.

She offers them hope and love.

I'm telling you all this because she said if I ever meet someone who is a parent of a gay child or they think their child may be gay, she wants to talk to you. She wants to help you deal with the hurt, the blame, the fear, the anxiety, and the questions. For some people, it's no big deal. So my son is gay...yippee!

However, for most people, it's not that simple. Pressure from society, pressure from your religious beliefs...the conflict that "coming out" causes can tear a family apart. Mom wants to do whatever she can to keep families together or repair damaged relationships. Other than personal experience, she doesn't have any professional qualifications, but ‘girl knows this stuff!’

Anyway, if you are the parent of a gay teen, and you are struggling with your child's recent coming out, let me know if you need someone to talk to. I'll give you her number.

Shaun originally posted this to his Facebook page on August 1st. You may find Shaun Kamiko on FB or write to editor@gayly.com to contact him. Call: (405) 496-0011.

The Gayly – September 8, 2015 @ 10:30am.