"Teenage Dirtbags"

 - by Jack Chandler
   Entertainment Writer

The kids at Morestown High are dirtbags. They scheme for love—and revenge. Around here, the line between the two gets blurry.

Everyone’s in a tribe—rich kid, poor kid, drama geek, jock—but the fiercest feud is between the gays. In one corner is “The Skwad” (yes, spelled that way), policing the “brand”—keeping the gays hip, pretty, witty, popular—or out.

In the other corner is Phil Reyno—gauges, long hair, attitude.

Phil’s not a likable guy—and that’s the point. He’s angry. Lashing out. He stole a stop sign and hung it in his room.

A reminder to stop being an asshole. Kudos to him for trying, yeah?

Phil’s got reasons to be angry—divorced parents, an alcoholic mom, a dad who doesn’t even live in the same time zone—but that’s all background noise compared to his rage at Jackson Pasternak.

Rage.

Jackson and Phil were best friends. Also secret lovers, ‘til Jackson decided to play it straight.

This seems like the setup for a standard best-friends-to-enemies-to-lovers story. It isn’t.

I wouldn’t be wasting your time if it were.

Let’s finish the setup so we can get to the best part: the revenge.

Phil thinks he’s found Mr. Right when Cameron Ellis publicly declares his love for him.

He’s wrong. Spectacularly.

I learned about this book in an unusual way. A guy who reviewed my book opened with the line that I was his new favorite author, which naturally made him my new favorite reader.

He then emailed me to explain that James Acker, author of Teenage Dirtbags, was the guy I might have displaced. I say might because the man has read Dirtbags four times.

In other words, my perch as favorite author wasn’t nearly as secure as I’d like.

Cue jealousy.

I bought the audiobook of Dirtbags just to prove a point. Damned if I didn’t listen to it twice. And—what the hell—I ordered a hard copy, too, because yes, I’m obsessive—and because I’m gonna get Acker to sign it.

If you doubt me, re-read the part where I admit I’ve already listened to it twice.

(James Acker, if you read this—let’s talk.)

Dirtbags may be set in high school and written for a YA audience, but what resonated for me was the takedown of the Skwad, the stand-ins for the same pretty, witty gays who try to police the rest of us even now.

Does anyone else get tired of letting that five percent dictate everything?

Dirtbags has an answer for that.

In case anyone’s making a list and checking boxes, so far we’ve got a love story and a revenge plot.

That’s gold.

What elevates this book to the platinum level is the messiness of its characters. Phil isn’t a squeaky-clean good guy. The Skwad is a bunch of self-important teens with their own baggage. Even the golden boy, Jackson, is riddled with anxiety.

Acker doesn’t sand any of that down. At one point, Phil squares off with Ronny DiSario:

“I’ll admit you’ve got a great look, Phil. Anyone ever tell you that?”

There sat Ronny DiSario. We just glared at each other for a hot second. Like two pissed-off alley cats waiting to pounce on a fishbone.

“Mix up your Vikes and Xannies? Gotta label them better, Ron, separate baggies.”

“Cute. You showering between classes again, or did y’all pay your water bill on time?”

If you felt the sting of Ronny’s dig, you’re part of the ninety-five percent—those of us who didn’t grow up in the Country Club or get brand-new cars at sixteen.

Even if you’re decades past high school—even if gauges aren’t your thing—you’ll revel in this story. You’ll root for Phil Reyno.

You might even see the Skwad differently—maybe not with empathy, but not cheering their demise either.

The Gayly online. 5/27/2026 @ 11:31 a.m. CST.